You're walking. You see him. You hate him. As you both awkwardly make your way down the hall you notice his group of friends surrounding him.
You pass by with your chin up and your nonchalant face.
His friends start yelling comments about you. He joins along. He laughs. And then in the midst of all that, he stares at you. You look at him. How could he do that? That isn't who is he. He is different- you know him. He is part of you and you are part of him. You are hurt.
You keep walking with your chin up and your nonchalant face.
I believe in not following the crowd. I believe in not changing who you are. I believe in being yourself.
Over the past four years of highschool, I have watched people change. They have grown, matured, and become who they are going to be for the rest of their lives. Are they happy with it? Yes, many people change and become someone that they were meant to become, they are proud of themselves and they stick to their beliefs and their morals. But, what about the people that change for others?
In my life I have met and become friends with people who have created aspects of me that I may have never had.
She gave me confidence.
He showed me patience.
She made me realize that I can just "let go."
They guided me the right way.
I became someone that I am proud of.
Sometimes, people get confused. They have lost themselves and therefore, they become the people around them. Sometimes, people are scared. They are not sure why they are different, so they find a way to be the same. Sometimes people change. They go against who they are and what they know.
No matter what I do in my life, I will always stay who I am and someone that I am proud of. Watching people around me change into someone that I know they are not, is frightening. It is scary to know how vunerable people are. It is so easy to fall into the trap of conformity and to forget what you believe in. Following your friends because you want to fit in, only makes you a coward. It makes you someone that I will not respect because it is not who you are.
So, change. Go ahead. Become someone knew. But make sure that it is someone that you want to be.
I believe in being your own person.
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8 comments:
Creative presentation!
I engaged in a bit of reverie as I read your missive, thinking about the people who have influenced the way I think and act. Some of them have no idea that they changed me in any way.
We affect people when we least expect it. Sometimes we never will know that we influenced someone enough to make him/her change in some way.
That you already are aware of the influences of others should help you to be aware of your own power to influence others.
Keep being aware!!
I could not agree with you more. I hate when you see people again after a long time and they have become someone else. You want to just grab them and say 'this isn't you,' but maybe that's who they've become, and it is upsetting. People do change over time, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse, but I think you have to just learn to live with it. Be yourself. Let others be who they want to be and that's how you decide who is important enough to keep in your life. The ones who won't change.
I too believe in being yourself, no matter what. You shouldn't change to try and fit in with the crowd. I can think back on a time not too long ago where I didn't act like myself and I really regret it now. I was worrying what other people would think of me, and I shouldn't have. Because if you want someone to like you for who you are, you should act like the person you are.
I just want to say thank you for bringing this topic to the table. I used to be one of those people that you talk about, and I would subject myself to the actions, characteristics and ways of others just so I could be accepted by them. It took me a very long time to realize that that true happiness came only from within me and not from a group of people that were only accepting if you fit their outline of a human being. I really try to be myself, and sometimes I slip, but hey, who doesn't? But it's so sad to watch someone subject their entire lives to someone and something that is not who they are because they are so lonely and so insecure that they will take that security and comfort and sense of belonging in any way they can.
This was really a heart warmer, and I am so glad that sanity still exists in high school. I almost wish you had added more examples on losing yourself in the chaos of school [perhaps not personal examples]. This could develop into a very inspirational piece. I am in awe. Love!
I totally agree with your belief as I think all high school students either go through this transformation themselves are lose a friend they once held dear. It is a tragic reality when suddenly your best friend turns on you to join a more elite crowd. There are so few genuine people left in the world, I think most of us share Holden Caufield's view of loathing a phony. I hate to see people deny themselves their true identity. One of the few things we have control over in this world is how we portray ourselves, I think we should all embrace the individual we are inside. I think we have all gone through struggles when we didn't know who we were, but that search and journey is important to be satisfied with the person you grow up to be. You know me, I don't exactly fit in anywhere in this world, I've finally learned who I am and I am not about change to make things easier. Individuality is what keeps the world progressing with new thoughts and ideas from each walk of life. Your blog was very creatively organized and had a wonderful message that most everyone can relate to on some level, great job!
Looking back as seniors, high school really changed everyone we all grew up with. It really turned most of us into who we will be for the rest of our lives, which is a sad outcome for many people... Sometimes walking through the hallway makes me exhausted and weary just from observing people and the way they act to impress people. Their voices change, their actions change, they change.
I feel that in this world we've come to know, it's becoming more important than ever to be yourself and be original. The world is full of phonies and many people don't even know which personality is their real personality anymore. The problem is that many people think conformity will impress people. But I look at it as the opposite. When I see someone who is original and sticks to their morals, they are the ones who catch my eye.
Just the way you presented your argument was original and creative. You proved that you are your own person. Good job.
This is a good point to bring up, and very relevant to the nearing end of our high school careers. This is very thought provoking, it really makes you think about the people you know, and think are they who they want to be, are they happy with who they are?
I also like the way you set your writing up, it was interesting and seemed to tell a story on top of just why you defend what you believe in.
theteach- Thank you, although it is hard to always stay aware I am constantly trying. Whether something good happens in my life or bad I always think about how my life would be different if the people in it didn't affect me the way they have.
lil ray of sunshine- Exactly! It is hard to stay true to what you believe and always keep who you are, but in the end it always pays off because you aren't lying to yourself.
hheartsonhold- I know, it really is sad to see people around us and especially people we have seen grow fall into people that we know they wouldn't be proud of. It is a shame and I wish they would find that security in themselves to get out of it and be who they want to be.
madcrazycool- thank you for the comment. There are so many examples (sadly) that I could use about high school and I am sure many of us could. Being with the same people for 12 years and watching them develop is rough and it affects who you are and who they are.
Bandgeek27- I really liked your reference to Holden Caufield. You're right, it's strange because most of us do want to be our own people, yet we all still sometimes fall into the trap of everyone around us. And I actually think the opposite of you... I think you have a major place where you fit in this world- in fact you are one of the people that I am trying to become because you know what you believe in and you stick to it :)
haveheart- It really is scary walking through the hallways and seeing how the same everyone actually is. Although it is hard to find, there are those few people that catch my eye, too. It is those people that make me see that there is hope for this conformity to become less of an issue.
doug- That is the real question... are they happy? I struggle with that very much. If they are happy by not being who they are, then maybe it is worth it for them. Personally, I know that I could never be happy or proud of myself if I am not being someone I want to be.
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